


Unfair Advantage

by Xie



Category: Queer as Folk (US)
Genre: Crossover
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-05-18
Updated: 2014-05-18
Packaged: 2018-01-25 16:14:50
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,340
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1654682
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Xie/pseuds/Xie
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>A drabble challenge fic I wrote in which Brian and Justin go on the home makeover show "Trading Spaces" with Michael and Ben. 43 drabbles!</p>
            </blockquote>





	Unfair Advantage

1

“You say that now…” Justin let his voice trail off, watching Brian’s face.

Brian shifted under him. “I am not… getting rid… of this chair…”

Justin sighed, and settled his ass more deeply on Brian’s cock. “Please?” He gave a good, hard squeeze to underscore his point.

“FUCK!” Brian grabbed Justin’s hips so hard his knuckles turned white. Justin squeezed again, watching Brian’s face twist into a pre-orgasmic grimace.

“Okay, okay,” Brian said, gasping. “I’ll call tomorrow. We’ll go… on Trading… Spaces … with Ben and Mikey … OH GOD.”

Justin grinned, and ground his ass down one last time.

2

Michael looked at Ben. “I still don’t understand why Justin wants to do this.”

Ben stopped writing, and looked at Michael. “Did you ask him?”

“Yeah. He just laughed and looked mysterious. What do you think they’re gonna do to our place?”

“Well, the rules of the show say we can’t ask them, or tell them what to do.” Ben frowned.

“You don’t think they’re gonna put in that ‘playroom,’ do you?”

Ben shook his head. “Justin wouldn’t…”

“Hmmmph.” Michael walked into the kitchen. 

“Trading Spaces wouldn’t…”

Michael considered that. “True.”

Ben went back to his papers.

Michael frowned. “Unless…”

3

Michael woke up, not sure why. He let his eyes drift closed.

They snapped open again.

Ben sat up. “Is someone throwing rocks at the window?”

“Sounds like it.”

He lay back down. “Probably looking for Hunter.”

Michael looked at him. “And that’s okay with you? Him going off who knows where in the middle of the night?”

Ben didn’t open his eyes. “Controlling teenagers never works. I thought you’d learned that.”

Another spray of pebbles hit the glass, and Michael jumped out of bed and went to the window. He opened it, and leaned out. “Shut the fu… JUSTIN?”

4

Brian stretched out his hand, expecting to feel Justin’s soft hair under his fingers.

Instead, nothing but pillow, without even the still-warm indent of Justin’s head.

Probably had to paint something, he thought. Then he was asleep.

_____________________

Michael set the coffee cup in front of Justin, and rubbed his aching head. “You want us to what?”

Justin blew on the coffee. “C’mon, Michael. You know he’ll love it.”

Michael sat down. Justin did know Brian better than anyone. Even him. “If you’re sure… and if we can…”

Justin nodded. “I’m sure.” He smiled his most sunshiney smile. “Trust me.”

5

Justin slipped in under the covers. Brian jumped at the touch of his icy nose. “Hey!”

Justin nuzzled him. “Sorry.”

Brian opened one eye. “Where the fuck have you been?”

“Sssssh. Go back to sleep.” He smoothed Brian’s hair back, and let his hand wander down and cup his cock. He felt it getting hard against his palm, and dropped a trail of kisses down Brian’s body.

Brian arched up into Justin’s warm mouth, his fingers tangling in his hair. “Nice try….” Justin’s tongue flicked into his slit, and Brian moaned. “Tell me later.”

Sure, Justin thought. Much, much later.

6

Brian refused to even acknowledge the presence of the cameras as they stood in the front yard. How the fuck had he let Justin talk him into this? How had Justin managed to evade answering his questions all week?

Sex, Brian thought morosely. Maybe he really was a sex addict. All Justin had to do was swallow his dick, or sit on it, or brush his hand across his fucking crotch, and all thought went right out of Brian’s head.

And this, he thought, looking at the Trading Spaces truck in front of the house, is what comes of that.

7

Brian stood behind Ben and Michael’s garage, smoking. Justin came around the corner.

“There you are.” He reached for Brian’s cigarette.

“Hey! You gave those up.”

“So did you.” Justin took a drag and threw the cigarette into the dirt.

Brian glared. “So, who did we get?”

“Genevieve.”

“Works barefoot. Love it.” He looked happy.

Justin looked surprised. “Brian? How did you know that? You said you’d never seen the show.”

Brian looked smug. “Google. Did you honestly think I wouldn’t do my research? Let me tell you, if the word ‘Hildi’ had crossed your lips, I’d have been gone.”

 

 

 

 

8

Ben looked earnestly attentive as Vern spelled out their options. If they managed to choose the bonus room it would double their budget. Which room, he asked, did they choose?

Michael gave his answer, and Ben looked at him, shocked at his choice and also the certainty in his voice. He frowned, and lowered his voice. “Michael? Can I talk to you a second?”

But Vern was laughing and assuring them they’d chosen the bonus room, and yes, they had $2000 to redecorate. The cameras shut off, everyone left, Michael followed, and Ben just stood there. What was going on?

 

9

Brian was kicking at the dirt in the bed in front of Ben and Michael’s house when the director came up to him. He was smiling in a particularly irritating way.

“Brian? Could you come over here?”

Brian followed, and felt the back of his neck prickling in apprehension when he saw the big smile on Justin’s face. Really big. Too big. And the cameras were rolling, but pointing out at the street, where a limo was pulling up.

Debbie climbed out, her face beaming, and headed straight towards him and Justin.

This, Brian thought, is going to be bad.

 

10

Michael and Vern were happily wandering around, pointing out possibilities. Ben followed morosely.

Vern smiled at him, and the camera crew moved in. “So, Ben, what do you think?”

Ben plastered a big, fake smile on his face. “Sounds great, guys.”

Michael pointed at the track overhead. “You know…”

Vern looked up. “The lighting possibilities are extraordinary, with this height.” He looked around. “It’s unusual to see a homeowner devote so much space to something like this.”

“It’s Brian’s major obsession.”

After sex, thought Ben.

“I mean, after sex,” said Michael.

Vern blanched. Michael looked guiltily at the cameras. “Ooops.”

 

11

Brian looked at Justin, shocked. The cameras rolled.

 “Why didn’t you tell me?” The subtextual “you little shit” was probably audible to the home viewing audience.

Justin kissed Brian’s cheek, “ I wanted to surprise you.”

Everyone is smiling, thought Brian. I’m going to be sick.

“Don’t worry, Brian,” Genevieve said. “Even though our team will be working on the new $50,000 kitchen at Vic Grassi House, you’ll still get $1000 to redecorate Ben and Michael’s kitchen!”

Brian’s fingers curled around the back of Justin’s neck. He was definitely going to strangle him, just not in front of the cameras.

 

12

“He’ll love it.” Michael pressed a kiss onto the side of Ben’s jaw as they lay in one of Brian and Justin’s guest rooms. Not even Michael dared to sleep in their bed, and Ben wouldn’t so much as go in there.

Ben groaned. “I’m sure you’re right. You know him better than anyone.”

“Except Justin.”

Ben groaned again. “What’s he going to say?”

Michael laughed. “It was all his idea.”

Ben sat up. “You didn’t talk to him about it? Michael! That’s against the rules!”

Michael wrapped his arms around Ben’s neck and smiled. “I know. Isn’t it great?”

 

13

 

“God, you’re such a shit.” Brian brought his hand down on Justin’s bare ass.

“You love it.” Justin pushed his ass up a little higher. “You love it when I’m a shit.”

Brian grinned. “You love it when I tell you that you’re a shit.” Smack.

“As long as you do it like this, yeah.” Justin bit his lip while Brian slapped his ass twice more, fast, then flipped over and lay across his legs, smiling up at him.

Brian looked at Justin’s wet cock, and ran his hand up and down the insides of Justin’s thighs. And smiled back.

14

Justin stood sipping coffee in Ben and Michael’s kitchen. Brian stumbled down, barefoot, in half-buttoned jeans. Justin wordlessly handed him his coffee.

Brian glared. “Remind me why we’re doing this?”

“To earn a $50,000 kitchen for Grassi House.”

“I would pay $50,000 to go back to bed.”

 “Because I rode your cock until you capitulated?”

“I knew that would come back to bite me in the ass.”

Justin put a hand on Brian’s ass. “I can do more than bite it, if you want.”

Brian looked at him over the rim of the cup, then at the clock.

Justin smiled.

 

15

Ben and Michael were waiting in the driveway when the truck pulled up. Carter jumped out and waved at them, then started setting up his work area.

“You know….”

Ben glanced at Michael. “What?”

“Brian would say….”

Ben nodded. “Yes, he would. But you won’t, right?”

Michael laughed, and kissed Ben lightly on the lips. “I’m a married man.”

Vern was waving the crew up the driveway, and Ben and Michael walked over to join them. He was smiling at them. “Ready for a Trading Spaces first?”

Michael nodded enthusiastically. Ben nodded hypocritically.

Vern nodded decisively. “Great. Here we go!”

16

Brian came into the kitchen, surreptitiously adjusting his jeans so they didn’t chafe his sore ass. 

Justin unfortunately caught him out of the corner of his eye and was choking on a donut when the Trading Spaces crew came in the door.

After Brian thumped Justin on the back and dislodged the donut, he turned to Genevieve.

“So, the kitchen… we’re still doing it? With a thousand bucks and anything we can find in the house?”

She nodded.

Brian smiled. “There are a few things in the garage you might want to look at.”

Justin stared at Brian. What the…

17

Justin stood in the garage with Genevieve and the crew, gaping at the array of gleaming new appliances lined against the back wall. “Where did these come from?” he asked carefully.

Brian shrugged. “I found them this morning when I was poking around.”

Justin started to choke again when Brian said “poking,” but quickly got himself under control.

Genevieve got over her shock quickly. “Well,” she said brightly, “this certainly takes the pressure off our budget.”

On the way back inside, Justin grabbed Brian’s arm. “I have no idea when, or how, but I damn well know who.”

Brian smirked.

 

18

Ben was on the top of a ladder, helping Carter hang a section of lighting. Their tight t-shirts had pulled up, exposing two sets of tight, toned abdominal muscles. Although, Michael thought happily, however hot Carter was, and he was, Ben’s were better.

Vern walked up quietly. “Did you finish that backing cloth?”

Michael jumped. “Oh, yeah, it’s over there.” He pointed to the area where they’d set him up with a sewing machine borrowed from his mom.

Vern’s face lit up, and he started running the sleek fabric through his fingers. “This,” he said, “is going to be perfect.”

 

19

Brian had his eyes closed, his mouth open, and his tongue sticking out.

Justin’s arm was braced against the alley wall, his legs spread as much as possible with his jeans around his knees.

“So... you’ll… go… along… with… it?” Brian grunted in his ear. Then he bit it.

Justin shoved back into Brian’s thrust. He was jerking hard on his cock with his other hand, and couldn’t even remember his own name, let alone understand what the fuck Brian was talking about.

“Yes… whatever… just FUCK ME, Brian…”

Brian grinned in triumph, gripped Justin’s hip, and just fucked him.

20  
Debbie stood on the steps of Vic Grassi House, beaming at the interviewer. “Vic was my brother, may he rest in peace…” She stopped and crossed herself.

The interviewer kept a professionally sympathetic smile on his face. “And your son and his family?”

“My son Michael and his husband Ben – they were married in Canada – and their son Hunter, he’s HIV positive, well, they needed a new kitchen, too, so Sunshine… Justin … heard about the special about community groups, and wrote to the show’s producers.”

 “So,” the interviewer recapped, “this was all Justin’s idea?”

“That’s our Sunshine,” Debbie agreed.

 

21

Justin was leaning his head on his arm. He felt Brian fastening up his pants for him, and then heard him fastening his own.

Brian nuzzled into his neck. “They’re looking for us.”

“Uh huh.”

“You have to tell them.”

Justin lifted his head. “Tell them what?”

“That thing we talked about.”

Justin looked blank.

“When I was fucking you.”

“And you expect me to remember?”

“Justin, we had an agreement.”

“Obtained under duress.”

Brian just looked at him, one eyebrow raised.

Justin blushed. “Okay, I admit it’s a tactic I may, possibly, have used. In the past.”

Brian snorted.

22

Brian sighed. “Never in the history of unconventional non-matrimony has anyone been led around by his dick the way I have been recently, Justin.”

Justin rolled his eyes. “You loved it.”

Brian ignored him. He had a point to make and he was going to make it. “You arranged this whole thing and used my inability to resist your sexual advances…”

Justin started choking.

Brian glared. “For someone with no gag reflex, you’ve sure been coughing a lot lately.”

“Fuck you,” Justin said, gasping and wheezing.

“Exactly. To top it all off…”

Justin groaned. “Puns, Brian?”

“Desperate times, desperate measures.”

23  
“Mr. Kinney?”

Brian smiled warmly. “Please. Brian.”

“Brian.” Carter glanced unhappily at the kitchen countertop. “I’m sure you know this isn’t faux granite. This is granite.”

Brian shook his head, and looped his arm over Justin’s shoulders. “No, it’s faux. Doesn’t he do amazing work?”

Justin buried his face in his hands.

 “Our Sunshine’s quite the artist.” Brian gave Justin’s shoulders a squeeze.

Justin groaned.

“In fact,” Brian said, “the lad’s a genius.”

Carter looked at Brian, then back at the countertop. “If you say so,” he said dubiously.

“Oh, I do.” Brian beamed down at Justin. “I really do.”

 

24  
Ben tapped Vern on the shoulder. “Vern?”

The designer turned. “Yes?”

 “Well, we’re almost done…”

Vern nodded. “Yes, it’s a triumph. A Trading Spaces first.”

I’ll bet, Ben thought. “I’m… not sure… Brian will appreciate…”

Vern touched Ben’s arm. “I understand, I really do. It’s true sometimes homeowners aren’t pleased with what’s done to their homes. But I want to assure you, Ben: that’s never happened with one of my projects.”

Ben smiled, thanked him, and watched while he walked away. No one was there to hear him when he said, “But you’ve never done a project for Brian Kinney.”

 

 

25  
Justin stood in the middle of the new, gleaming, updated, enlarged, light-filled kitchen that one thousand dollars of Trading Spaces’ budget, significant amounts of deception, and generous applications of Brian’s money had made possible.

Justin felt a twinge of guilt when he thought about how it all happened. At least, he thought, it was for a good cause. And the changes at their house were all being done according to the rules.

Well, except for the fact that he basically gave Michael a blueprint for the whole thing. But other than that.

He just concentrated on smiling for the camera.

 

26

“So, what do you think Brian and Justin will say?”

Michael smiled happily into the camera. “I know they’ll love it. Especially Brian.”

The interviewer laughed. “He must be a very unusual guy.”

“Oh, he is,” Ben interjected. “One of a kind.”

“True,” Michael agreed.

Just then, a limo pulled up. Ben and Michael looked at it, puzzled – even more so when Debbie got out.

The interviewer wasn’t surprised.  “Before the big reveal, there’s something we’d like to show you.”

Everyone was smiling. Debbie beckoned from the car.

Ben and Michael looked at each other, then slowly walked towards her.

 

27

Michael was out of the limo before it stopped.

There was a Trading Spaces truck and multiple camera crews. Emmett, Ted, Mel and Lindz with the kids. Hunter, Carl, Blake, all their family.

And Brian and Justin – Justin smiling, and Brian trying to look bored.

But Michael could tell inside he was bouncing on the balls of his feet, rushing down the path, and dragging him up to see what they’d done.

He felt Ben’s hands on his shoulders, and he looked up at him.

Debbie stood next to them, glowing. “Let’s go see.”

Michael followed her down the path.

 

28

"But…”

Justin hugged him. “We still did your place. But we also did… this.”

Michael stared at the crowd in front of Grassi House. He turned to Debbie. “Ma! Did you know?”

She shook her head. “Not until two days ago. No one knew except Sunshine.”

Michael looked at Justin. “And Brian.”

Brian snorted. “No, apparently Justin doles out information on a need to know basis, and concluded I didn’t need to know.”

Brian flinched when Justin elbowed him in the ribs. “Ow.”

Justin smiled angelically. “I made it up to him with sex.”

Brian nodded. “It’s true. He did.”

 

29

Brian dragged Michael inside, everyone else following.

 “Re-wired, re-plumbed, redesigned. Walk in refrigeration.” Brian’s voice dropped reverently. “Top of the line industrial appliances.”

Michael shook his head. “I don’t know what to say.”

Ben did. “Thank you. This is a wonderful surprise. And it means so much more, knowing how many people will benefit from this, instead of just us.”

Brian smirked. “Very eloquent, professor, but we did yours, too.”

Ben suddenly looked stricken as Michael said, “And we did yours!”

Brian looked from Ben’s face to Michael’s, and then at Justin’s innocent eyes. Fuck, he thought. Fuck fuck fuck.

 

30

Brian watched Ben and Michael take the grand tour. He smiled when the cameras turned his way, but regarded Justin and Michael with deep suspicion when they pointed elsewhere.

The first chance he got, he cornered Justin in a dark hallway. “You. Spill.”

Justin blinked slowly. Brian leaned into him, and felt a sudden urge to …. He shook his head. “No. I’m onto you, Sunshine.”

Justin smiled softly, and trailed one finger down Brian’s jaw. He blinked again. “It’ll be okay.” Blink. “I promise.”

Brian felt his dick start to harden. For the first time, he resented his penis.

 

31

Justin kissed Brian’s throat, letting his tongue trace his jawline. He cupped Brian’s hardening cock, and wound the fingers of his other hand in his hair.

Brian sighed, and relaxed into Justin’s kiss and touch. “I want it duly noted,” he said, “that I’m not falling for this, I’m just taking advantage of it.”

Justin murmured against Brian’s neck, and unzipped his jeans. “Duly noted.”

Justin pressed Brian back against the wall, and dropped to his knees.

Brian tipped his head back against the wall. He was reasonably sure this was a mistake, but at the moment he didn’t care.

 

32

Brian and Justin re-emerged from the hallway off the entryway just as everyone was getting ready to leave for the big reveal at Ben and Michael’s house. Michael looked knowingly at Justin’s ruffled hair and swollen lips, and Brian’s self-satisfied smirk.

Although, Michael thought, on second glance, Brian’s lips looked a little dark and swollen, too. And his hair… No, he decided. He may have blown Justin – anything was possible – but Brian Kinney definitely hadn’t come within a hundred yards of a camera with messed up hair.

They all got into the limos, and headed for Ben and Michael’s house.

33  
Michael stood in the middle of their new kitchen. The pushed-out wall had made the room much bigger. The new French door tripled the light. The appliances gleamed.

“And here we have an amazingly realistic …” the host’s voice faltered for a second… “faux granite countertop, that Justin painted.”

Michael smiled and nodded, but Ben looked at the countertops, and then looked again. He felt Brian step, hard, on his toe.

The host bubbled, “And we did it all with a thousand dollars, and a few things we found in the garage!”

Ben almost choked, but didn’t say a word.

 

34

They all gathered in an emotional group hug while the cameras rolled.

 Ben and Justin beamed and glowed. Michael tried not to cry. Brian tried not to vomit.

Genevieve wiped away a tear. “This has been one of my most successful renovations,” she gushed.

“I’ll just bet,” Brian snorted beneath his breath. Then he gave an “oof” as Justin’s elbow jabbed into his side. This home redecorating thing, he thought, was dangerous.

“So, let’s go to Brian and Justin’s.” Michael’s eyes were gleaming.

“Oh, yes, let’s,” Brian said. Only Justin knew how much sarcasm was buried beneath his sunny tone.

 

35

Justin bounced happily in the seat next to Brian. Debbie smiled from across the limo. “Settle down, Sunshine. We’re almost there.”

“Yes,” Brian said silkily. “Settle down, Sunshine.”

Justin ignored them both, and looked out the window. “We’re here!”

“What are you, ten?” Brian said grumpily.

Justin just tossed him a smile and climbed out of the limo as soon as they’d pulled into the driveway.

Ben and Michael had gotten there first, and Vern was standing with them in the driveway at the side of the house. Justin trotted off to join them, Brian following slowly. This was it.

 

36

Brian shook Vern’s hand for the camera, then stood with his arm lightly over Justin’s shoulders. That would make strangling him more convenient.

“This has been,” said Vern, “One of our most unusual projects. You could even say it’s unique. Like yourself, we’ve been given to understand.”

Brian smirked. Maybe he wouldn’t have to kill Justin after all. Or Mikey.

“Are you ready?”

Brian shrugged. Justin pinched his ass. He smiled brightly. “Absolutely, Vern. Let’s go.”

Vern smiled. “Michael, Ben, do you want to show them what we’ve come up with?”

Michael smiled. Ben paled. Justin gave another little bounce.

 

37

Michael had run a little ahead, and turned and faced them. “Hurry up!”

Ben took a deep breath, pasted a big smile on his face, and hurried. Justin was pulling Brian by his hand, and laughing. Vern was standing next to Michael when Brian and Justin came up them and looked into….

The garage.

The teak floored garage, with industrial lighting splashing off the rough-surfaced cement walls and illuminating the Corvette, which was sitting on a platform covered with black industrial steel plating.

Brian stared at his beloved car, sitting in solitary splendor in the radiance of a single spotlight.

 

38

Brian vaguely felt Justin’s hand pulling at his, and he let him tug him to the wall.

“This is the control panel, Brian.” Vern’s voice cut through the fog of incomprehension Brian was caught in. The GARAGE?

He shook his head and looked at what Vern was showing him. “This is how you control the temperature…” He punched in a few commands. “It’s fully integrated with your home cooling and heating system.”

Brian nodded. Of course it was. He’d already seen to that.

“But then we added the lighting, and these controls…” Vern entered another code, and the spotlight changed.

 

 

 

 

39

A brilliant blue light flooded the room. Brian glanced at Justin, and saw his eyes on him, amused. Warm even in the blue light.

“And this…” Brian looked back at Vern, and the control panel. “This is the opposite effect.”

The blue faded into an orange radiance, filling the room with hot energy, and making the Corvette look like something out of classic comic book art.

With one flick of his hand, Vern restored the original white lighting. “But of course, for everyday use, you’ll prefer this.”

Brian nodded, and felt Justin squeeze his hand softly.

Vern smiled. “There’s more.”

 

40

Vern led Brian to the car. “We integrated a state-of-the-art car wash and drying system, with drainage under the platform. I was told,” Vern said, “That you’re very fond of this car.”

Brian looked at Justin and Michael, who were both grinning like idiots. “It’s alright,” Brian said.

“Lastly,” Vern went on, “We brought your home entertainment system out here. You can watch your giant screen TV and listen to music, all controlled via remote.”

“Yeah, Brian, so now your car can watch TV.” It was Michael.

Brian tried to think of a snarky reply, but nothing came to mind.

 

 

41

Brian was in the Corvette, windows down, playing with the remote. First the music, then the TV, then the DVD player. Then he changed the lighting, and did it all again.

The passenger side door opened, and Justin got in.

Brian filled the room with blue light, and turned to him. “This was you.”

“It was Ben and Michael.” He was smiling.

“Right. Ben and Michael. Like Trading Spaces did their kitchen?”

“I have no idea what you’re talking about.” He put his hand on Brian’s thigh. “Do you like it?”

Brian ignored the question, and turned the lights orange.

 

42

Justin had fallen asleep in the passenger seat. Brian turned off the TV, looked around his garage, and laughed quietly. Justin stirred, and opened his eyes.

“What?”

“Let’s go to bed.”

Justin licked his lips and blinked twice. “Wow. That’s a good line.”

Brian leaned across the space between the seats. “Do I need a line with you?”

Justin kissed him. “Nah. I’m a sure thing.”

Brian touched his forehead to Justin’s. “Thanks.”

“For what?”

Brian shrugged. “The surprise.”

Justin rested his hand against Brian’s face. “Let’s go to bed.”

“What a great and innovative idea.” But he was smiling.

 

43

Justin stretched, his arms over his head. “I missed our bed.”

Brian lay on top of Justin, kissing and stroking him everywhere. Justin all but purred.

Brian fucked him slowly, keeping him just on the wrong side of coming. “Promise me this was it.”

 “What?”

Brian stroked him with his cock again. “This was it. No more reality TV. Promise.”

“Brian…”

Brian stopped moving. “Promise.”

Justin’s voice dripped with frustration. “Fine. I promise.”

Brian smiled, pulled all the way out, then thrust in again. Justin groaned, and locked his legs around Brian’s waist. “This… is… so… unfair…”

Brian kissed him.


End file.
